Over the course of a lifetime, women take on many roles: student, worker, sister, daughter, niece, mother, soccer mom, homework helper, pet feeder, and caregiver. We never seem to give any of these roles up! We just pile on more.

For more, read this article: theenergyproject.com

For many of the women pictured at right, this may be the only time in the day they have to pause and take a breath.

Why do women have trouble understanding that self-care doesn’t equal “being selfish?” Did we hear that from our mothers, or simply observe that that’s the way women acted? I was praised for being selfless. A woman who was “self-sacrificing” for the sake of her family deserved praise.

As a young mother I instinctively knew that my children’s needs came first, and mine dead last. Overextending myself, particularly in the lack of sleep department, made me short-tempered, but I simply couldn’t imagine that a single mother with four small kids could find relief from the rat race of job, shopping, meals, music lessons, and after school sports. I wanted my children to have “it” all–the good life, whatever that meant. I pushed  back the thought that I wanted a good life, too.

Self-Care and the Oxygen Mask Analogy

On an American Airlines flight, that all changed. The flight attendant demonstrated the oxygen mask and then said the adults were to put theirs on first, before putting masks on the kids.

“Who are they kidding?” I thought. Of course, I would put the kids’ masks on first.

In the years since hearing that for the first time, I’ve thought about self-care and selfishness, and realized that the oxygen mask was about more than what I should do in an airplane emergency. The oxygen mask stood for the daily habits of nutrition and exercise that I am still trying to put in practice.

Why do women have trouble understanding that self-care doesn’t equal “being selfish?” Did we hear that from our mothers, or simply observe that that’s the way women acted? I was praised for being selfless. A woman who was “self-sacrificing” for the sake of her family deserved praise.

As a young mother I instinctively knew that my children’s needs came first, and mine dead last. Overextending myself, particularly in the lack of sleep department, made me short-tempered, but I simply couldn’t imagine that a single mother with four small kids could find relief from the rat race of job, shopping, meals, music lessons, and after school sports. I wanted my children to have “it” all–the good life, whatever that meant. I pushed  back the thought that I wanted a good life, too.

On an American Airlines flight, that all changed. The flight attendant demonstrated the oxygen mask and then said the adults were to put theirs on first, before putting masks on the kids.

“Who are they kidding?” I thought. Of course, I would put the kids’ masks on first.

In the years since hearing that for the first time, I’ve thought about self-care and selfishness, and realized that the oxygen mask was about more than what I should do in an airplane emergency. The oxygen mask stood for the daily habits of nutrition and exercise that I am still trying to put in practice.